you are enough

aka: the longest and most personal post I have ever written

I have found myself reflecting on this post by Kelly McCalleb  in quiet moments throughout this weekend (it's certainly worth reading in its entirety). 

Kelly was inspired to write this post after watching a Mia Michael's interview (of course giving up  "So You Think You Can Dance" was the most painful part of canceling our TV--but Dale and Lynett have been so gracious about our long SYTYCD marathons at their house courtesy of their TVO) :

 "She [Mia Michaels] said something that i can't get out of my mind. they asked her how she felt about her emmy, won for last year's work on sytycd. in response, she got a little emotional and talked about how hard she has had to work in this business because she wasn't a typical dancer. she said, 'to be recognized for being exactly me, and nobody but me, was powerful.' i wonder if the award would have been quite so powerful had she spent her career copying other styles instead of honing her own? when she was trying to make it, all her critiques at auditions were: 'you're an amazing dancer, but you need a better body. sorry.' would she be quite as proud of her work if she listened and went the eating disorder route rather than saying, "screw you, i'll just coreograph?" (which is what she did)."

Kelly talks about the dangers of comparing ourselves to others and the beauty of being true to ourselves:

"he gives us each different experiences that are tailor made for each one of us, for what we need. for our growth. for our good. he gives us each different talents to contribute. some of the most important talents are not tangible ones, like kindess and generosity. and what he is concerned about is what we do with what we've been given. our gratitude. our service. our sharing.

elaine jack said, "sometimes comparisons creep up on us. some of you may say, 'i’m just average. there’s nothing special about me or my life.' and yet what is manifested plainly to me is that you are extraordinary, you whose average day is lived in accordance with our heavenly father’s laws. you show your love for the Lord daily as you support husbands, nurture children, care for parents, benefit neighbors, serve in your schools, sit on community councils, and do much of the work of this world in and out of the home. no one is more impressive than you."

here's to loving ourselves for who we are. here's to finding out what god has designed for our life. here's to developing and sharing the gifts we have been bestowed with and enjoying the gifts others have been given. here's to shunning covetousness. here's to being happy for others' successes, rather than jealous. here's to feeling powerfully true to ourselves as children of  god."

As I mentioned I have thought about this all weekend.   I knew I wanted to share this post, but was still thinking about why it had touched me so deeply and what I wanted to say in relation to it.  This morning I was re-reading my patriarchal blessing and noticed a letter from my dear friend Emily that I had tucked in the same "very important pieces of paper" binder.  Emily's letter solidified the thoughts that I wanted to share.  It is a very personal letter (written to a very stressed out me a few years ago).  I hesitate sharing it, but felt strongly impressed to do so. 

Perhaps if we could understand how a good friend views us it would only help us to understand how much love and understanding our Heavenly Father views us. 

"You are an incredibly talented, wonderful, creative, fun positive person that has been given some tough, tough trials. 

There are so many things that are fantastic about you.  I've always loved it that you were such a good hunter.  I never really could understand hunting but I have to admit that I always took this secret little pride that you were a good hunter and always killed more than the men.  I love it that you went to Fiji and Russia and taught ESL classes.  I always dreamed about going and making a difference in the world and you really went out and did it.  I think it is so neat to see all your scrapbooks you keep for your family.   I don't think you realize what  rare and wonderful talent that is to keep such a great family history--not only in pictures but in writing.  I love it that you are always reading.  You are one of the few who always has to have a book and I can count on you to help supply my need also.  Not to mention that you are always there to swoon over out classic romance movies with me.  I've also always considered you my "in tune with nature" friend.  You have those special farm girl roots that make me feel like you are one with the ways of Mother Earth.  Who else could I pick raspberries with and discuss intricate jam making questions?  Of course you are my gardening mentor.  After seeing that picture of Bronwyn with the lamb I was reminded of how you grew up with so many animals.  I have vivid memories of you as the White Witch and saying your classic line in the movie you made with Cari about it being okay to dump the dead body into the stream because it was "biodegradable."  As you read your books to us at the book club sleepover and acted out Grover I saw that that drama talent had not gone to waste.  I'm sure Bronwyn and Davis always have fabulous bedtime stories.  You make everything beautiful.  Whenever I come into your house there is evidence of this.  It's not just that you are a good decorator but you have this special flare--this special way of making things uniquely Brook.  Even the invitations you made for my shower were so adorable and so Brook.  Nothing is cliche.  You don't just frame a cute picture: first you take a fantastic candid shot, then you frame it some cool way after you have repainted the frame.  Your house is just screaming, "A very talented person lives here!"  It's thanks to you that I have made any crafts at all.  My favorite quilt that I sleep with every night is the one that I made with you from all your mom's scraps.  You taught me the granny square and I have a fantastic afghan to prove it.  I see this same "Brookness" in the way you mother.  It's hard to explain but it's just in the way you play with Bronwyn and talk to here.  Those two are very lucky to have you as their mom.  You have so much spiritual strength.  It takes so much courage to stand up for your testimony.  I admire you so much.  And to top off all these amazing qualities is your physical beauty.  You are gorgeous and always have been.  I've tried not to be too jealous.  All this is just the tip of the iceberg.  These things seem ordinary to you because you've lived with yourself for so long and they come naturally.  But they aren't ordinary they are extraordinary.  I know you don't see yourself this way but you need to try because this is the truth.

I keep thinking about the line in The Secret Life of Bees when August tells Lily: "You are enough."  You are more than enough.  I love you so much."

Do you not think if a friend of 17 years could write this, what letter would our Father in Heaven write?  Would He not be able to see all our strengths, our weakness, our trials and write us a beautiful letter telling us He was proud of us and that we are enough.  That not one of us is ordinary but that each of us is extraordinary.

Speaking of extraordinary, I in turn could only have the highest regard for you, Emily .  Truly  you are a woman of courage.  Truly you are an example to me of a woman who has enough faith to not be afraid of hard things. 

These two quote were written in the comment section under Kelly's post.  May each of us today feel that we are enough TODAY and celebrate the extraordinary-ness of one another. 

Jeffrey Holland: "...No one of us is less treasured or cherished of God than another. I testify that He loves each of us—insecurities, anxieties, self-image, and all. He doesn't measure our talents or our looks; He doesn't measure our professions or our possessions. He cheers on every runner, calling out that the race is against sin, not against each other."

Patricia Holland: "Obviously the Lord has created us with different personalities, as well as differing degrees of energy, interest, health, talent, and opportunity. So long as we are committed to righteousness and living a life of faithful devotion, we should celebrate these divine differences, knowing they are a gift from God. We must not feel so frightened, so threatened and insecure; we must not need to find exact replicas of ourselves in order to feel validated as women of worth. There are many things over which we can be divided, but one thing is needful for our unity—the empathy and compassion of the living Son of God."

Comments

[Brooke Hoopes]

Absolutely beautiful. Thanks for each word.

[ML]

Re Brook: I could have told you that!!

Re Mia: Then why was she so flipping brutal?? Quick--send Courtney your post! (Not to mention Comfort, who surely took the worst of it.)

Phew! (Just sounding off about Mia. Sure do love you!) :) xoxox

[ML, again]

PS--That was just my way of connecting over SYTYCD. (I'd love to hear your in-depth analysis of the results show.) It occurs to me, however, that this post really wasn't about the show, and that perhaps a more Pat Holland-style comment would have been appropriate here. Or at least a classy repartee devoid of slang. How about a Haiku, as a nod to your Japanese roots: Brook Andreoli. Loves family, beauty, good books. Is she enough? Yes!
xoxoxoxox

[D Goddess]

This post has affected me more than you'll ever know. Well, you kind of know. Thanks for your kind words the other day.

[Alicenbateman]

I hope you don't mind that I poked around on your blog. :) I really needed this post today. What a beautiful letter from your friend. And what an inspiring thought to know that our Father in Heaven knows each of us as well as a good friend, if not better. So, it looks like you wrote this years ago, but thank you today, sweet Brook. oh and p.s. your children's book posts are so rich and beautiful. You are so creative and find so much beauty in the world...thanks for sharing!